Memories (cont)

Aug. 5th, 2008 10:28 am Pronounications
I was told today, once again, by Sarah and Mal that I talk like I am from Minnesota. Not just any where in the MidWest. No, I am from Minnesota. I have catch myself sometimes saying my "o's" long however Ididn't think I did it that often. Today Sarah and Mal gave me some examples of times I talk like a nutter..... I say "castume instead of costume," "Mam instead of mom" and "gane instead of gone." The "o" is changed to a nasally "a" as they say. Crazy! Where/who did this wacked out accent come from? When did it develop? Will a goregous midwestern man one day find it sexy and sweep me off my feet?? I can only hope.

Aug. 4th, 2008 01:00 pm Jonah, Rayla, Family Videos, and Happy Meal Prizes!
Jonah and the Creep Craig's List Guy
Jonah Oh decided to buy an amp from a man of Craig's List. I guess the guy looked like a creeper online and was a little odd in their dealings. None the less, Jonah decided to buy the amp from this creeper and was not assertive enough to establish a meeting place for the exchange other than the man's home....Jonah, being Jonah, was paranoid that the man was going to kill him. As I sat working at the Foss front desk, he walks up to me and says "Alex, I am going to buy an amp and I'm scared the guy to going to kill me. If I'm not back by 4pm today, call the authorities. Jeff knows to do the same thing. I will be in contact with you both as soon as the deal is done." Slightly concerned, I asked Jonah if he needed someone to go with him and he just shrugged off the idea. "No, I'll be fine. If things go bad I'll be safe because I have this." Then he proceeded to lift his shirt where a medium pocket knife was attached to his belt. "I have another one in my pocket!" He left me speechless. What could I say. Jonah walked out the door and purchased his amp. He made it back safe and sound although apparently it was a close call!

Weighing Breasts
I had a marvelous time the other day! I got to visit Sara, Rayla, and mom down at their house! Sara and I sat in the sun rocking on their swing while Rayla told me about her new cute boy toy who's one downfall is that his name is Robert Smith. How boring! Anyway, mom cooked us a yummy dinner with potato salad, ham, bread, and salad. The salad was my favorite with fetta cheese crumbed on top in spinach/icberg lettuce with craisins! After dinner we went inside to help with the dishes when somehow we started talking about Sara's unfortunate challenge of dressing her 3 busty brides maids! The conversation took a crazy turn when Rayla and I tried to determine how much or breasts weigh! We figured it'd be interesting to know how much our backs carry around so we started brainstorming ways to find out. Rayla ran to the cubbard and pulled out a scale that weighs food in ounces.....next thing I know Rayla and I are plopping are boobs down on the scale top trying to get an accurate read! Supposedly one of my boobs weighs 12 oz. but we don't think that could be right. My girls have to weigh more that 2 pounds! Anywoo, the game ended when mom walked around the corner and glared us down! Rayla and I lost it and started laughing so hard we were crying! It was beautiful!
After the boob weighing party, we all decided to play Apples to Apples. Sara had a cool idea where you play with an inanimate object. Basically you just throw in a random card and see if it gets picked over everyone elses who thought much more carefully!! It was pretty funny because matt's fish actually beat me, getting 12 cards to my 9! Another crazy way Sara said we could have played is to put the red cards in first so we don't get to see what green card they are going to be matched up with! The game was fun and I really do feel like the Cooke's home is my own when I am there. I love my second family!

Winning a Happy Meal
I bet Jeff Olsen Kringle that I could make 10 free throws in a row. He did not believe me so I bet him a Happy Meal! Took me a few shots to get on a roll but once I hit my first, nine more followed perfectly! I now await the day of my kick butt Happy Meal with the priceless toy!

Watching Family Videos
The other night mom and mandy pulled out the Yellowstone videos from their trip that I was conviently left home from! They called me downstairs and despite what I expected, there was old family videos playing from when Scout was a puppy. Boy was she a cutey!! Mom video taped the craziest things like Scout's first snow and first time meeting Tugger and Tess. Some of the fun videos were: Mandy with three dog toys where only one had a squeaker. She would mix them up in front of Scout and Scout's job was to find the one with the squeaker. I'm sitting on the floor watching as mom video tapes. Five times Mandy mixes the things up and everytime the Beagle pick the wrong one. Finally, I just go off and start yelling "this is lame" and "apparently she can't do this trick." It was a goodie.
Another video consisted of the big fake black lab that dad brought home from work. Mom has it sitting in the living room and is video taping Tugger and Tess sniffing at it as though it's really. When mom moves the dog a little bit, Tess squares the black dog up and starts growling like she's something tough! It's just funny as hell seeing her about to pounce!
Last video, which I think takes the cake in the funny category, is the infamous Scout and balloon clip! It is my 18th birthday and someone left a balloon on our doorstep. Mom has the balloon sitting in the living room and is video taping Scout who will pick up the weigh, carry it for a while, and then drop it once she realizes a balloon is following her. She can't figure out that they are connected. Anywoo, next thing you know, she picks up the weight but gets the string wrapped around her, so when she takes off running from the balloon, it only follows her! Around the kitchen, around the dining room table, to behind the couch! Terrified she runs as Tugger chases after the balloon! The funniest thing I have ever seen! Mom is thinking of sending it in to America's Funniest Home Videos.

Aug. 1st, 2008 02:47 pm Thought it was funny.
I'm fat. But you're ugly. I can lose the weight.... :)

Aug. 1st, 2008 01:36 pm Ear Doctor
Went to the ear doctor today. Found out that I have to have tubes put in. That wouldn't be such a big deal if I didn't have to go back to school in 2 weeks. Now I might have to move in late to school so I can have the surgery done. Oh well. The doctor was a nerd. Completely socially awkward. Now I know why we need nurses! To make the doctors seems competent after they leave because when patients talk to them they seem off their rocker. My doctor reminded me to the monotone guy of the Dry Eye commericail....ben stein I think it is.....anyway he's not a talker that's for sure! The only relatively entertaining thing he said was "do people ever say you speak loudly?" I just started laughing because of course they do! Not only does my voice carry but I talk louder too. The doc said that my ears have been F-ed up for a while so there could be a correlation between my loudness and my ears. Can you imagine if I get the surgery done and I begin talking at a normal level?!? I know! Pretty hard to believe huh! Well I guess we'll all just have to wait and see!

Jul. 31st, 2008 03:41 pm I almost killed Lexi....
So as you recall I made Puppy Chow.....A few weeks back I promised Kevin Berg a bag because he had never heard of the yum goodness! So while Jenica and I clawed at each other, dividing up our Chow, I made a small baggie for Kevin. On the baggie I wrote "Kevin, Here's the Puppy Chow like I promised. -Alex."
So today I was sitting calmly at work, when a woman named Maggie walked in. "Julie is trying to get a hold of you Alex! (Julie is married to Kevin) She wants to know if you left her dog food on her porch." I had no clue what the hell she was talking about so I decided to e-mail Julie asking what she needed. Ends up that she couldn't figure out who left the bag of "Puppy Chow" on their porch. I admitted it was me and Julie goes e-mails me back explaining why she was so confused....The Bergs neighbors had mentioned a few weeks back that they made healthy treats for dogs and offered to make the Bergs some for their pooch Lexi. When the goodie bag showed up on the porch, they figured it was for the dog and ignored the fact that the name on the bag did not match the neighbors. I guess last night they feed a few to poor little Lexi! Good thing they figured it out or they could of killed the poor girl with the chocolate!! So that's was my story. Because of the Berg's lack of knowledge when it comes to AMAZING homemade desserts they almost killed thier dog.....at least she would died happy.

Jul. 30th, 2008 09:28 am Chowa de Puppy
One of my dearest loves, Miss Jenica, and I made our amazing puppy chow last night! I ate some just now and am in Heaven. Harassing Travis was fun like always and the simplicity of sitting my basement talking to Jen was all I needed. Twas a good night.